於是，我便狠狠地記住了這次發生的一切，很不開心因為辜負了你的100%信任，但也謝謝你之後對我的100%包容。只願以後問題可以越來越少，笑聲還是那麼的多。

       P.S 本人9號前往香港，10號晚8點的飛機：香港-台北-三藩市。北京時間19號三藩市-密爾沃基。由於時間十分緊迫，行李還沒收拾好= =|||，所以未必有時間與各位親相聚了，見諒見諒。

   著實我并沒打算荒廢大巴，只是這幾個月的生活平靜如水了，再者你們都清楚我的動態，便不必多此一舉地在這裡留下痕跡。

    仍需謹記：等不到的不應再貪。

      這個圣誕又是悲傷籠罩，寫不下去了，先這樣吧，

   桌游嘅英文唔係table game啊，係board game啊，大家唔好再搞錯喇！話說系國慶嘅時候第一次玩桌游之后，我就深深咁迷上咗呢個活動。我呢D玩咩都有一股“又屎又爛癮”嘅不屈不撓精神嘅人，即便系學校嘅時候個心都好野，好想玩，其實我更想見到同聽到嘅，係一班人玩桌游時候嘅笑容同笑聲，畢竟可以聚埋一齊（唔係上課唔係討論功課唔係交流搵工經歷），純粹係玩樂同笑哈哈，呢D機會越嚟越少，所以呢鋪我好積極咁糾集各路人馬。幸好，唔少人都十分支持兼且積極響應。希望星期一之約可以順利進行。

講真，初初搬去LJ嘅時候我係懷住十分抗拒嘅態度，因為覺得PY唔似廣州市區咁方便而且冇熟悉嘅街坊，同以前班F嘅距離亦遠咗好多。但係住落之后發覺，其實LJ D人都有吸引到我嘅地方---責任心。呢度好多人養狗，但係我系小區內嘅街同路度都未曾見過狗屎狗尿，因為狗主們每次遛狗都會自覺處理好狗狗嘅排泄物。好，講翻正題，維權。講起都有D慚愧，之前我基本上好少留意有關LJ嘅新聞，但係今日翻到屋企執起咗sip係門la嘅紙睇完之后，先發現原來之前新聞報導過PY建嘅垃圾焚燒廠嘅事其實同我息息相關，因為佢嘅位置離LJ唔算遠，而且一旦建好，就會有有毒氣體排放，到時就會嚴重影響我地嘅居住環境。張紙就係LJ一班業主自發印制嘅呼吁大家23號去政府部門合法提出意見嘅宣傳單。我一睇完，第一個反應就係唔理個日有冇課，打死都要去！需知道，係GZ有呢種機會好難能可貴所以要好好珍惜，發表自己嘅睇法等zf聽下乜野先係真正嘅民意！雖然渣人話：“唔好抱太大希望，通常都係你地講完跟住佢地繼續，完全唔理你地”，我答佢：“嗯，唔會抱好大希望，但係起碼我有機會去講自己嘅意見出黎我已經好滿足了。”其實個班咁有heart嘅業主，就係因為佢地嘅責任心，先會不斷努力爭取自己嘅合法權益，先會令更多人加入呢次行動。

其實，我還是那個熱血青年嘛，呵呵。

3.食狗肉嘅全部去死       冬天來了 狗狗危險了       

每年冬天一到，D狗就會有危險，有被人食嘅危險！今日見到間飯館門口嘅廣告牌，令我非常憤怒：“本店于提供各式美味的狗肉，保證香噴噴。”的確，聽唔少愛狗之人講，一到冬天就會有好多狗被人拐咗跟住就成為桌上菜。冇錯，我就係一個dog freak，對于食狗肉嘅人無限鄙視兼會詛咒佢地一世！唔好同我講什么“魚蝦蟹雞鴨鵝都係生命啊，又唔見你會唔肯食”之類嘅話，照咁講，魚蝦蟹雞鴨鵝難道都好識人性，都會好溫順咁被人撫摸，都識表達佢地嘅喜怒哀樂？！所以呢類言論根本係荒謬至極！廢話唔講，我系度祝每位殺狗拿去賣同埋食狗肉嘅人不得好死。

      離二戰殺G還有一個星期，要來的始終都會來，心情比第一次平靜，卻并不踏實。接下來的10月基本在家中度過，復習-考試-再復習-再考試。昨晚的回程，剛走上大學城北的手扶梯心里就有些許傷感，然后便回頭看看地鐵站外的夜色，曾多次走過的這段路，我將不可能永遠經過，就像從前爬過的7層舊樓，也不再是回家時理所當然的必經之樓梯。暫時離開一個月的感覺，讓我想象到畢業時真正離開的那刻嘴硬的我亦會說出“我不舍得”。我想起了《Twilight》里Bella在Edward家看到了很多Graduation Cap，因為Edward的一家都是immortal，他們只能年復一年地在輾轉到不同地方讀高中，所以Graduation Cap擺滿家里也不足為奇。雖然Bella知道后說“It's kinda miserable”，可是于我們的大多數，能夠一直讀書一直認識新朋友在現實社會中未嘗不是件好事，至少可以在單純的世界里做單純的事。

       最近看了很多劇，也就受了那么一點點沖擊，觸碰到我的敏感神經所以我又無邊無際地想些有的沒的，這是本巨蟹女的特點啊。說說《Desperate Housewives》，劇情讓我越發感覺不安，尤其之前在每晚睡前都看一兩集，讓我小小地失眠了一陣。Why do people learn something only from bad things, like lies or death, rather than good ones? 三季看下來不同人間積累的各種疑惑、恩怨、陰謀使這劇的基調十分十分dark，這是現實的某部分寫照嗎？然后沖著對vampire的興趣看《Vampire Diaries》，暫時最大的收獲是第三集的插曲《Never Say Never》，高潮部分“don't let me go”的重復最讓人感受到悲情。我對Damon很感冒，尤其是他與Katherine之間的糾結故事。俗話說，愛情的力量的確很偉大，催化了正邪間的轉變。不得不提，男一Stefan在劇里打橄欖球的情景讓我一瞬間著迷了，就像《Twilight》里Edward與家人在雷電交加的日子打棒球，力量的美感和男性獨有的魅力只有通過體育運動才散發出來，哈哈，我是體育男花癡？笑～還有《下一站，幸福》，簡單自然的段子讓人感覺很是貼近，所以我有被不太新穎的劇情感動到。   （待續）        

      10.19晚  從國慶假期到現在整整三分之二個月，從開始的頹廢到后來的拼命，這些復習的日子我都充實地過著，過得現在已經不想回學校面對無聊的作業了，orz. (待續)

      10.25凌晨 It is not the end but the beginning. 可以松口氣了么？I'm not quite sure about that. I still have a long long way to go. 今天從考試中心走出來感覺自己的腳步真的很沉重，心有千千結。有很多繁瑣但異常重要的事等著我，伴著些許焦慮和惶恐，第一次有got to deal with everything individually的壓力。最近常鼓勵自己：盡管對未知有多么的恐懼，亦不能坐以待斃，就算明知結果是死也不要坐著等死，因為奇跡也許就由站起來行動的那一刻起發生。顯得有點虛，不過it does work somehow.

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      放假首晚就與渣人群的主力們相約麻將，很遺憾的是這次還是沒見著JN。（好吧，都是因為我=。=） 確實，搬去PY讓我遠離了市區，讓我即使只在晚上九點半時位處流前都會開始擔心趕不及搭三號線和接駁線，也因為這樣，眾人為我改變了原本的計劃，于是乎我們八點多去陳家祠會合JN食晚飯的約定就被我弄砸了orz，再于是乎我就很自然地變成了九點多就踏上回家路的乖孩子和被emily鄙視了一下下的壞人。總的來說還是蠻開心的喇，邊打麻將邊互相調侃，實在太有趣喇！！對了，還見到了傳說中的渣人童鞋，赫赫赫赫，你是個很搞笑的人，也要感謝他打麻將時不時把我需要的牌扔出來，哇哈哈哈哈！

      二號八卦幫的一眾密友相約桌游，話說這是本人首次接觸桌游，除了UNO。沒想到桌游比麻將更好玩！人數沒有限制，而且價錢超值。大家在玩的過程實在太投入了，叫得很大聲笑得很猥瑣，激動得差點把桌也掀翻。還發現了其實我們都很強大，用左手畫蒙著眼畫一筆畫完，反正幾乎每次都看不出畫的是啥但都可以猜出來那到底是啥。最最無敵囧的是，其中一次阿嫻畫了一個斜塔（猜一個地名），當眾人都在七嘴八舌的說“意大利”“羅馬”的時候我情不自禁地說出了“巴黎”二字，“答對了”，在我沉醉在勝利的喜悅時大家都笑翻了，既然“巴黎”是答案，那畫出來的絕對不能是“斜塔”啊；而我看到是“斜塔”的時候猜的竟然不是“意大利”或者“羅馬”而是不沾邊的“巴黎”囧rz～好吧，我姑且稱這次無心之失為“當傻冒遇上傻冒”,囧。從下午一點多玩到七點多，幾乎exhasted，而后在pizza hut解決晚飯，期間大家多次挖掘八卦題材但都無功而返（因為最最焦點的事情都已經在暑假的時候被挖完了么=。=）然后討論的大方向居然是美劇！

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      喂，全部和我玩過沒和我玩過桌游或正在看這blog的童鞋，你和你和你和你，趕快和我一起玩！！！

--------------------------------------我很懶我很懶---------------------------------------- 

       p.s 1.月餅節我買不到紙燈籠但老爸買了個孔明燈回來（到現在還沒放=。=）

              2.月餅很難吃冰皮月餅更難吃！

      負罪感再濃重，也敵不過人性本質的黑暗支配。可悲。 

    (These fotos certainly don't cover all my frdz that I've seen n hung out wif.)

 8 sweeties^^

5 gorgeous ladies^^

little Lisa, Diane n Dan^^

Eric n Diane^^

       p.s 老fa，我今天可是特意穿著你送的短裙，muuuuuua~說實話我覺得我非常適合穿裙子啊哈哈哈哈！

   7.22    我用了老爸不知啥時候的X光片看到日偏食了！弱弱地紀念下~ p.s 今天你在新加坡，我們之間終於沒有時差了^^

         What helps me understand and deal with this is the fact that I was once in their shoes. I once played a supporting role on this team. Back then I knew how much pressure Shaquille had on him to win a ring and I also knew I could help. So I studied the game offensively and especially defensively because I knew that if I could harass on the perimeter with him clogging the lane, it would demoralize our opponents more than anything we could do offensively. I also knew that the teams he played on in the past did not have a closer. No one could take the game over down the stretch or hit the game winner or make the key free throws. Those were Shaq's weaknesses, so I had to step up and make them my strengths. I knew how much more I could bring to the battle, but that wasn't my role. I was a scorer who became a facilitator in order to win. But now I worry because I know how hard that was for me to learn, how many sleepless nights I had and how much criticism and trade rumors I had to endure before I mastered my role. This is probably what my current teammates are going through. All I can do is pray that one day we will reach the same level of chemistry and understanding that existed between me, Shaq, Rick Fox, Derek Fisher, Robert Horry and all the other players I once went to war with. 

         The fears I have are soothed a little by the presence of Phil Jackson. Simply put, he is the best coach I have ever played for. Everything I have learned about the game can be traced to him and Tex Winter. They teach the game at such a deeper level than X's and O's. The game is a rhythm, a dance. Phil and Tex have taught me to feel the game. To think the game without thinking, to see without seeing. They taught me how to prepare. How to conceptualize the spirit of my opponents and attack them where they are weak. I've seen how prepared PJ gets before games, and as the on-court leader he is trusting me to do the same. So I do all the things he has taught me to do before tip-off and once the ball is in the air my mind is at ease and my body is ready to play. I take it to the other team on both ends of the floor. I take pride in being able to do that. I HATE being scored on, even by players who some say are "un-guardable". I don't believe it when they say "Oh, that player is just hot today." F--- that! Cool his ass off then. 

         When we play on the road and the entire crowd is booing me it doesn't bother me at all. What I think about is simple: "When these fans leave this game I want them to remember how hard I fought and the passion and drive with which I played." I have always played this game with passion. And I always worked hard. When I saw the movie Rudy I remember thinking, "What if I worked that hard?" God has blessed me both physically and intellectually to play this game, so what would happen if I push as hard as the character in this film? I would love for people to think of me as a talented overachiever. Even though those fans may chant "Kobe sucks", when they leave that arena I want them to walk out with a different feeling than they came in with. When they leave they'll leave with the understanding that they have just witnessed a player give himself completely to his passion; they have just watched an athlete pour every ounce of his heart and soul out on that floor. And hopefully, when the next volume of my life is all said and done, they will respect and appreciate the years that I spent giving all of me to the game that means everything to me.

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         Recently I have come to visualize my place as a black athlete within our society. I've always been aware of our history, from Jackie Robinson to Sweetwater Clifton. But I never felt like I deserved to be a part of our tradition because I grew up overseas, in Italy. In that way I am very much different than many of my peers. I never truly believed that my own people wanted to identify with me. But that's the thing about adversity: while you're going through it, you look around yourself and see exactly who it is that's rallying behind you. During my time of struggle I saw the truth. My people held me down. Their love and support became an experience for me and that experience will be with me for the rest of my life. It gave me a completely different understanding of my role. I had been wrong about my impact. Now I see that I can be a force in the lives of our youth. They look up to me for guidance and support. They have shown me that even though I grew up in Italy, I am a part of black America. The color of my skin ain't paint! It is, in fact, more than a color: it's the signifier of my culture. 

         When I went to visit the victims of Hurricane Katrina and saw how their faces lit up when they saw me, how they embraced me, and how my presence lifted their spirits; I realized how wrong I'd been about everything. I've wasted all these years wanting to do things for our people but thinking I wasn't the one to do them, that I wouldn't be welcomed. But now I see that isn't true. The experience of Katrina and my own personal struggles brought me closer to our people. And through that closeness my motivation has become stronger and my purpose has become even clearer.

         Being called a role model has become code for being "able to sell product." But the true essence of a role model lies in influencing our youth to be better, not perfect, not to buy sodas or fast food or whatever; but to be better, no matter the odds or the circumstances. As an athlete I am someone who is in a perfect position to inspire our youth. They look at us as heroes not just because we win, but also because we fail. They witness us overcome obstacles right in front of their eyes. There's no editing, no CGI; everything about it is real. They watch us fall, get back up, fall, get back up, and fall again. In the course of a 48-minute game or an 82-game season they see us climb an entire mountain. It's my duty to help them understand that falling is a part of life and getting up is a way of life. The will to overcome is crucial. And because basketball is a metaphor of life this is a lesson I can give them as I struggle to accomplish my goals. As I help to rebuild my team on the court, I can do the same off of it, helping to rebuild and restore the lives of the people I see in trouble by inspiring them to do what the "experts" say can't be done.

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         I have been an outcast my entire life. From being the only black kid in my town in Italy all the way to when I was 17 and playing in the NBA. What separated me from others, even more consistently than skin color or age, was my hunger. My mission. I've always been made to feel like there was something wrong with wanting to win so badly and wanting to become the best at what you do. But I have found a place to fit in amongst people with a similar vision, specifically my family at Nike. My association with them means much more to me than just an endorsement deal. At Nike I am surrounded by people and athletes who share my will and my commitment to be number one at all costs. 

         Last summer I had the honor of being invited to the Nike campus in Beaverton, Oregon for a ceremony honoring the company's co-founder, Phil Knight. We athletes had to wait in the green room before the show began. I found myself sitting amongst athletes that I had never met before but whom I felt right at home with. 

         Let me explain:

         There are certain kinds of people that are purely driven. I can tell who they are simply by looking at them. I have faced so much criticism for my drive that at times it has alienated me from the majority: the people who are comfortable with second place, the people who hate against me because I am not. You know these kinds of people; they are the ones who fear winning, the jealous ones who envy and try to sabotage. They are the people who have been telling me I couldn't win all my life. Many times my drive to succeed has put me on an island all by myself because no one understood me, or they chose to misunderstand me. They chose to portray me as being something that I was not.

          So on that day, sitting in the Nike green room with those other athletes, I saw the purity of drive in their eyes and it reassured me that it was OK to be different than others. It's OK to want to be the best. It's OK to feel like a loser if you don't win it all, and it's OK to bounce back with a stronger will, a deeper sense of determination, and a desire to destroy your opposition.

          I have learned that it is OK for me to be me, and what being me entails. It means that I will not rest; I will not sleep, relax, relent or be satisfied until my goals have been met, the challenge answered and all my doubters silenced. I will not give in to my foes; I won't let down my teammates. I won't stop inspiring those who look up to me or stop giving motivation to those who motivate me. I will not back off until I'm back on top, back in the place where they said I could never be again. Mountains don't scare me. The LACK of mountains scares me. The climb up, the struggle for every inch of ground and every level of ascension is what feeds me. I welcome that challenge. I welcome that chance to be fed because no matter what — no matter how hard, how far, or how many stand in my way, I remain determined.